All the Gold Stars: Reimagining Ambition by Rainesford Stauffer is about examining our needs and motivation behind our ambitions. The idea of ambition has been woven into Americans’ minds and lifestyles since early childhood for many generations. We are taught as children that having ambition is important for us to be successful or worthy in life.
Ambition can be many things to different people. It is that need, the want, and hunger that drives someone to do something. We strive for it at an early stage in life; to get our first “gold star” or recognition for something we did. We celebrate people who hustle and grind, those who are driven, even when they have an unfair advantage compared to others as they achieve their success. We are conditioned to be ambitious and strive for more even when we are burning out or know that our work will never end no matter how much we give.
The book reports on how cultural, personal, and societal expectations can shape our ambition and lead to people burning out by tying our personal worth to our productivity. Our ambition can limit our imagination, destroy personal relationships, and degrade our happiness. The author weaves her personal story about her own ambition crisis, along with advice from experts and experiences from others.
As the author peels back the layers of outside influences, she shines a light on the effects ambition might have on us. I thought that was interesting and thought-provoking to read. I grew up thinking that if you weren’t ambitious, that you weren’t successful, or were a loser in life. I was a bit hesitant when I first started reading the book because mostly, I found it hard to go against something I was trained to believe was the best course of action for a satisfying and fulfilling life.
Each chapter was organized in an easy to digest way. I used the end of each chapter to regroup my thoughts and think about what would be the next steps to end the chain. I realized how easy it is to assume that if someone didn’t have a good job or didn’t get to a certain stage in life at a certain point, that they weren’t successful.
I found it relatable to my life experiences: I went to a networking event with a few friends and the first thing people asked was “what we did”, and then I noticed people’s reaction to what other people had said. The networking event was for a hobby of ours that wasn’t related to our everyday work but yet we viewed some people who had certain jobs as more “valuable” than others. I must admit, it was hard not asking a person when you meet them for the first time without asking what they do.
I like that the author included stories and experiences from not only professionals but from “ordinary” people. It showcased how ambition is defined and shaped by outside influences. For example, someone from a different socioeconomic background might view starting a business from a hobby one way versus another person from the other end of the spectrum, i.e. an impoverished person might be hesitant to do that because they need a hobby that takes their mind away from the daily grind. The one thing I would have liked was tips on how to combat the need to feel ambitious to the point where it is counter productive. I would have liked to see some activity to help restructure ourselves or ways to put some of her suggestions into practice.
